Finnish weather explained
+15°C / 59°F
This is as warm as it gets in Finland, so we'll start here.
People in Spain wear winter-coats and gloves.
Finns are out getting a tan.
+10°C / 50°F
The Portuguese shiver violently.
Finns plant flowers in their gardens.
+5°C / 41°F
Italian cars won't start.
Finns are cruising in cabriolets.
0°C / 32°F
Water freezes.
The water in Vantaanjoki (river in Helsinki) gets a little thicker.
-5°C / 23°F
Californians prepare for the Apocalypse.
Finns have a final barbecue before winter.
-10°C / 14°F
Brexit campaigners propose moving the actual country south.
Finns think about using long sleeves.
-20°C / -4°F
Aussies lose the power of speech.
Finns end their Midsummer celebrations. Autumn is here.
-30°C / -22°F
Greeks die.
Finns start drying laundry indoors.
-40°C / -40°F
Paris is cracking apart.
Finns eat ice creams in the line at hamburger kiosks.
-50°C / -58°F
Polar bears evacuate the North Pole.
The Finnish army postpones winter survival training awaiting 'real' winter weather.
-60°C / -76°F
Russian hitchhikers use pictures of thumbs instead of thumbs.
The Finnish army begins winter survival training.
-183°C / -297.4°F
Microbes die.
Finnish cows make ice cream, and complain the farmers' hands are cold.
-273°C / -459.4°F
All other atomic motion stops.
Finns say "Perkele, it's cold outside today."
-300°C / -508°F
Hell freezes over; Satan skates to work.
Finland announces a tax cut.
